The Spell Checker on Blogger Sucks

It doesn't even recognize 'blog.' I mean come on.

I Propose We Market Our Presciption Drugs Directly to the Public!

If big business tactics have taught us anything, it is that multimillion dollar ad campaigns are essential to any kind of success. Clearly our current policy of restricting our advertising to the media of ball point pens and post-it notes is far from sufficient.

Also, I think we should no longer focus marketing on the doctors. After all, they are educated, informed, and a little bit impartial. No, it is the public that is stupid, sheepish and paranoid. We must advertise to them! Never mind that the doctors are the ones who are supposed to decide what drugs a patient gets. That's a stupid idea anyway. It's a free market isn't it?

Let's get on this immediately. Go purchase 20 soft focus lenses and the rights to some shitty acoustic new-age song. I will hit the streets to find a moderately attractive, prematurely graying couple.

Dinosaurs Are Awesome

Exhibit A:







Exhibit B:








Exhibit C:









Exhibit D:

I Like My Women Triangle Shaped

Sexy.

If I Come Out with Any Kind of Product, I Will Put My Own Price Right on It

See, I don't want anyone else to have any control over my product. If some store manager wants to sell my crap for more, then I will sell less of them. Not acceptable. If he wants to sell it for less, well, fuck him. It's not his goddam decision to make. I am in charge. I make the decisions. No successful business leaves such crucial decisions to lower management. My sucessful business will not leave these decisions to any management. Except me.

Buy my product.