Since I'm on the topic of UFOs . . .

A Few Things Not to Expect from an Alien Encounter:

1.) Any meaningful communication. Even if they are capable of telepathy, there is no reason to think we could understand their thoughts. It's more likely that their attempts at telepathic communication would be the equivalent of unleashing a dozen angry howler monkeys into the very depths of your soul. If you are lucky, it will quickly be a fatal experience.

2.) That they will take us seriously. Either as enemies or as allies. Trust me, if this race is capable of interstellar travel, the best possible result is that they merely find us amusing. Please God, let them have a sense of humor. Maybe they will take a few of us home as pets.

3.) That I will not be the man behind the scenes. Never underestimate my power.